Thursday, July 10

Murphy's Law

When one purchases a strapless dress for a wee party one might be attending in San Francisco next week, one should remember to do the shoulders with sunscreen before entering the inferno known as the great outdoors.
Craptastic, n'est pas? I'm thinking a red marker should fill in the blanks nicely.

It doesn't hurt but somewhere in the wind I hear the sound of a hundred dermatologists sharpening their biopsy scalpels.

24 comments:

Kyla said...

Go outside with the REST of your shoulder slathered in sunscreen and let that one stripe burn, too. Maybe?

Or don't and make it an awesome cocktail story. Heh.

Ali said...

i had me a matching one of those last week. luckily for me i have the kind of boobies that can't wear a strapless dress...those puppies need to be secured. (wait...maybe that isn't actually lucky...)

Christina said...

Ouch. Yeah, I think I can hear those dermatologists, too.

You can just tell people you've got invisible straps on the dress. Is the dress white? Your strap burn could blend right in.

for a different kind of girl said...

I totally sucked in my breath and was all "Owww!" when that picture popped up in my reader. This is why I am full on vampire from mid-July to late August.

11111111 said...

Run a strip of painters tape over the whiteness and apply loads of sunblock, then remove the tape and go outside until the colour evens out.
Pure genius.

Janet said...

Just carry a bag with wide straps on that shoulder for the entire duration of the party! Oh, is the burn on both sides? Then you'll have to lean against a wall, too.

I'm am such a fantastic problem solver.

Julie Marsh said...

Ack. Those dermatologists have been sharpening their scalpels in anticipation of my shoulders since I was a child.

Glad it doesn't hurt at least.

Mandy said...

I always manage to leave some patch missed and end up with a burn.
Darn this lily white skin that wasn't mean for anything stronger than a moonbeam.

Kevin McKeever said...

See being a drunkard, shut-in pays off.

Amy Urquhart said...

I got the same burn last week. The good news is that it mostly faded, so there's hope!

If all else fails, I'll just walk around with you and put my arm around you. Too weird? heh

Chicky Chicky Baby said...

Ouch. That looks like it hurts. You might be wearing that strapless dress sooner than you thought just so you won't have to put anything on those shoulders.

Oh, and my inner bitch says that's what you get for going to Blogher without me. That's not really how I feel but I'm bitter. :(

Run ANC said...

Ouch!

Once it settles down, a sunless tanning cream, maybe...?

Heather said...

Oh that will peel in a day or two won't it? So you'll just have that dead peeling skin thing going on.

I'm not helping am I?

Backpacking Dad said...

And that is why I won't be wearing a strapless dress to BlogHer.

Anonymous said...

spraypaint, maybe?

Urban Daddy said...

Not sure about the spraypaint but I do agree that it looks like it hurts and that if you smother the rest of your back in SP45 sunscreen but leave the strap marks, you may have a chance...

mamatulip said...

Ouch.

Just wear a burlap sac. Or a grocery bag. That will totally deflect the attention from your screaming shoulders.

Anonymous said...

ouch!

the mama bird diaries said...

You poor girl. Mega ouch.

Chris said...

Ow!

Anonymous said...

You have no freaking idea of how damn excited I am to see you again, chicky.

(And not just cuz that means I won't be the only dork with a raging case of peeling shoulders and sunburned nose in the room.)

Heh.

Unknown said...

Nothing a bit of red food dye won't solve. Get your kids to do it.

kittenpie said...

I have tried Kyla's suggestion of trying to even out the burn, only to end up with a smaller strip of double-burned flesh, a nice red line across the shin. Sweet.

I say fill it in with self-tanner, assuming the rest will fade to tan-ISH by BlogHer.

BUT! You are pale like me (nearly)! What the heezie were you doing out without sunscreen?!

Mayberry said...

OK I just read like 6 posts in a row and I am choosing THIS ONE to comment on because I love a reason to tell this story. During a charity bike ride my sister worked a pit stop. There was some kind of theme in effect and she had to wear a costume that involved fake blood dripping all over her neck and chest.

And she got a sunburn. It was AWESOME.