Monday, July 14

what red, white, and scared all over?

You people crack me up with your comments and suggestions.

After contemplating all your ingenious quips on how to wear a strapless dress with a sunburn from hell, I've decided to have SB create a cross hatch design in duct tape on my back and shoulders and I will stand out in the sun until I burn that puppy in like a tattoo.

You are such smart, smart people.

Perhaps I'll start a trend that will make dermatologists and oncologists everywhere say my name in vain. Oh yes, I can start a "motherbumper" cursing trend in the medical community.

Or maybe I'll just strap on a diaper like my friend right here and drag my pitchfork to San Francisco. Do I have to check pitchforks or are those okay for carry on?

Have I ever mentioned that I've never been to the Left Coast before? Nope, never. I flew over the Pacific but never actually laid eyes on it. And it's been a life long dream to go to California. Not sure why (*cough* Hollywood stalker *cough*) but for some reason I've always wanted to go there. I know San Francisco is not LA but it's a start.

OK - I'm avoiding what I really want to say which is "OMG I'm so scared to go to BlogHer but it's too late to cancel".

There I said it. The fear and anxiety has kicked in and I have no pharmaceuticals for coping.

I think I'm going to spend a lot of time hiding behind potted plants this weekend. Except when I'm handing out drink tickets at the door of The People's Party on Thursday night. If you see me there, be kind and don't rewind - introduce yourself because I'm too shy to do it myself. I'll be the red and white doofus who's popularity will be in direct proportion to the drink ticket distribution.

Anyone else freakin' out?

22 comments:

nomotherearth said...

Hey man, I'm freaking out about BFF and it's a much smaller gathering. It's not immediately obvious, but I'm VERY shy in actuality.

kgirl said...

I wish I was freaking out.

ourlittlefunnybunny said...

I'm like Nomo...definetly freaking out. Should I start drinking now?? I'm rooming with 2 complete strangers!!!

Don Mills Diva said...

I'm not freaking out but I think it's because I lack a certain self-awareness...

Assertagirl said...

I'll be seeing you at the gate on the way to board our flight!

IRISHKAT said...

Still bummed I am not going. Hope you have a great time!

Chag said...

I'm not freaking out.

I'm sure you'll be fine. You're a veteran.

Heather said...

If I was going I'd totally be freaking out.

Mimi said...

FREAKING OUT!!! Let's freak out together once we're there, okay?

(Is this like finding a buddy so you don't have to walk into the cafeteria on your own for like, every lunch period and spare between 1987 and 1992? Is it? Just wondering ...)

Janet said...

Fashizzle, you know it.

Hey! What flight are you on? Maybe we will be on the same plane. I will be the nervous woman with the death grip on my travelling companion's arm. I hate flying.

for a different kind of girl said...

Only by osmosis. This doesn't mean, however, that I probably won't wake up with a gigantic zit on my nose on Thursday, just because it seems logical.

kittenpie said...

Can't believe you didn't link Binkywood with your Hollywood stalker comment...

I'd stand by your side all night if I could, honey, but trust me, people are going to LOVE you. I know. I'm people.

TentCamper said...

Well...I'm not going...though I wish I was...conference hall full of unaccompanied women...blogger women!!!! anyway I love your blog and have added you to my blogrol.

Hope you'll visit.

Lady M said...

See you at the People's Party! Are you bringing Canadian chocolate again? ;)

Mandy said...

I'm very shy in person and I absolutely SUCK at meet and greet events. My husband keeps trying to coach me (he's a master at mingling, meeting strangers, life of the party kinda guy), but I still struggle.

However, I'm REALLY excited to meet you and so I will say hello at the door and be happy to know I'm not the only one shaking in my strappy sandals.

Mom101 said...

So who does a woman have to tongue kiss to get an extra ticket at the party?

Oh wait - it's you!

Alex Elliot said...

What's the People's Party? Seriously I'm going to BlogHer and the event hasn't even started yet and I already feel lost. I went last year too! I just heard there's a mommy blogger party too. I'll be the person wandering around looking lost and clueless!

the mama bird diaries said...

You increased the font size of your blog or am I just totally out of my mind. It's awesome!

Maddy said...

Nope I shall just lie back and bask in everyone else's flurriness [possibly with a hint of green]
Cheers

scarbie doll said...

I am definitely freaking out dude. Especially since when I wrote a similar post asking people if they wanted to meet up there, I heard tumbleweed float by. Dear God I hope I'm not going to suffocate you with my timid leachyness.

Stimey said...

Dude, you're going to be the most popular striped girl at the ball. I personally can't wait to meet you!

T@SendChocolate said...

Darlin' I am terrified out of my pants, honestly. But knowing that most of us are gives me courage.

(and I am commenting not through my blog because it is being worked on (gotta love tech-support husbands)

T.