avoiding reality

Hey, remember the other day when Gigi had a revelation about Boots the monkey and I pondered what dream-shattering revelation would be next? This latest incident proved the kid is on to me already - Santa Claus doesn't even have a fighting chance. And you know that really sucks because I really couldn't wait to screw with my kids head by telling her that a stranger breaks into our house once a year (without the benefit of a chimney) and leaves us stuff. And then in the same breath warning her to NEVER TALK TO STRANGERS - especially the ones giving out free candy or puppies. Commence mindf**k.

Anyhow, recently we were at Union Station where the walls are plastered in Telus Ads - ya know, the ones that can't help but make all kinds of folk smile with their insatiable abuse of animal cuteness. They got me during the monkey phase. Anyhow that fact is completely irrelevant, the point is - Telus has moved onto marketing meerkat smiles.

While passing through the gauntlet of huge wall-size, seemingly smiling faces of these damn cute specimens, Gigi asked me what kind of animal they were. All I really knew about meerkats was learned from staring at one of these posters back in junior high.

I imparted all of my wisdom and probably helped her get a D in grade four science. I know when she does animal science in grade school, she will flunk because I learned her real good. You know, like when we were at the zoo and I told her stuff like: There is no baby lion in this display because the lion parents ate her after she didn't share with the other baby lions and threw tantrums all the time so parents just up and ate her. Hey, I've never claimed to be a perfect mom.

Anyhow, later the same day after we again passed through the gauntlet of meerkat in the train station and then boarded a subway plastered in the very same ads. It's nonstop meerkat in Toronto I tell ya.

Gigi had now stepped up the meerkat conversation to what they are to the WHY phenome. Everybody loves the WHY component of parenting - don't they? (says the momma pulling her hair out in chunks).

So yes, she wanted to know WHY there were pictures of meerkats everywhere "in 'dis place?" (that's how she talks, and when she says "in 'dis place" she spreads her arms wide and shakes them like she's some mini Al Pacino). Excellent question my grasshopper of cynicism, question the corporate intention.

So I told her that the meerkats were selling phones to commuters. She pondered this answer for a few minutes.

Then she responded with a voice so laden with disgust, it dripped: "Mummy - meerkats don't sell phones. They don't use phones". Oh yes they do grasshopper, cute sells to the masses, right after sex.

Oh and in case you are wondering about the cat - that's my parent's cat and his look pretty much mirrors mine. Deer caught in headlights. Gigi and I are at my parent's house this week, doing family business. Which makes us sound mobish. So I think I'll run with that.