Payback is so unoriginal, he doesn't even pretend to not be ripping off the reaper, he just hangs out in a dirty bathrobe with a piece of rusty old school farm equipment waiting for whiny schleps like me to f-up and complain about something so trivial as lost "me" time just so he can slash me from behind.
Colds in the summer time ought to be illegal. Cold sweats while simultaneously feeling the relentless humidity of Sourthern Ontario is cruel, cruel, old skool. Mix that with quick dry cement in the sinuses, achey joints that rival my 100 year old neighbours, and a cough that also rivals that same crotchety codger and you have one pissy blogger.
Hell, that codger and I could have had a codge-off this past weekend if I could have lifted my head off the pillow long enough to whine in his direction. He'd probably counter that with a "Pillow?!! When I was your age, you were lucky if you got a bag of rocks to sleep on - AND THAT WAS ONLY IF YOU WERE ONE OF THOSE ROCKERFELLERS". Glorious Basterd.
ANYHOW -- the only joy I found this weekend besides watching this wonderful slice of Swedish Vampire Låt den rätte komma in (<-- that's me being all pretentious and referring to it by it's original name because I'M A TOTAL FILM SNOB, Y'ALL) was spreading misinformation to my child -- which is a family tradition of sorts.
This weekend my daughter stuck an unarmed ratchet driver in her belly button and when I lunged at her screaming "NO!" she assumed it was because it was dangerous.
But no... there was no imminent danger from this tool in her umbilicus, I just saw a golden opportunity to screw with her head because it's not often I can do it without repercussion.
So when I told her DO NOT DO THAT in mom-caw screech, she asked in a hush voice "why?"
And like my Father before me, I told her you never EVER unscrew your belly button lest your butt falls off.
Her eyes widened, my smile brightened, and all was well with the world of misinformation.
And so the torch is passed.
****Today I'm over at Canada Moms Blog vexing over Junior Kindergarten and I'm also over at MamaPop hosting a Harry Potter Contest so get yee muggle butt still attached to your belly button over and enter now.