Monday, October 6

three eve

As I write this post I cannot help but think back to what I was doing exactly three years ago today. At this time (being almost 8pm on October 6th, 2005), I was settling down to watch Survivor Guatemala when the phone rang. It was the nurse telling me to come in to be induced, they were ready for me to deliver.

Wait - let me back up a bit. That sounds way more dramatic than need be.

Let's back up to 5am, three years ago today:

I woke up a split second before it happened: my water broke. It was one of those split second wake-ups, like the one you get right before a charlie horse where you have enough time to register "I'm awake, but why?" before the real reason hits you. But in my case, it was just moments before my water sprung a leak. Maybe I should call it her water, as opposed to my water, since she was the one in it, but I was the actual pool that held the water so I guess it's my water... hmmm, that one is a thinker.

Anyhow, I managed to sit up and shuffle to the door to tell SB what just happened. He was already awake, on the computer, surfing, and enjoying his coffee. All was good.

We were both oblivious to how our peace and quiet mornings were ceasing to be the norm, and morphing into the seldom seen. We were oblivious to many things at that time. Ignorance is bliss.

I think that even if given the chance to really know how tough it is to raise children and survive the no sleep days & nights, even if given the chance to really understand what parenting really includes, to read all the fine print, I wouldn't have asked for that foresight. If we knew, what we know now, we may have never signed up for parenthood. Nah, wait - life without the kidlet? No I wouldn't change that, we wouldn't change it for the world... well maybe - depends on what time of day you ask me. Anyhow, despite everything, the fact is I'm a parent now and that is not going to change.

So back to breaking water. Nothing much else happened except the water breaking. No contractions, no blood, nothing really to report except a slow leak. As the hours past, still nothing happened. I called triage and they told me if nothing happened in the next two hours, come on down. So two hours past, nothing happened so we headed on down. We were the next contestants on "The Price of Getting Jiggy".

We made our way to the hospital but I decided to bring nothing with me. I knew, just knew, they were going to send me home so I didn't bring my stuff and we took the subway. Oh yes we did.

AND .... they sent me home. But not after monitoring me for a while and asking politely if a med student could do my vitals and history, you know, for practice. Being agreeable, I said yes and the student stepped forward to start the history namblepample.

As the examination progressed, he asked to lift my shirt so he could examine mah non-contracting belly. Now usually I would insert a joke right here about med students asking me lifting my shirt, but this post is about the birth of my only child and that would be inappropriate. But feel free to make up your own and leave it in the comments.

So yes, med student asks me to lift my XXL Roots mens long-sleeved tshirt which barely met the top of my totally stretched out university sweatpants (the ones that say Dal across the butt but due to the stretching there really was enough space for "Dalhouse University, Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada, Established 1818 ora et labora, visit our website at www.dal.com"). I obliged the curious med student, lifted my shirt and was more than a bit shocked when the student reeled back and exclaimed "what is that?" while pointing at my non-contracting belly.

Um, pretty much the very words you do not want to hear a doctor (as junior as he may have been) say/scream while pointing at you and your "poppin' fresh, still in the belly" baby.

Turns out, sheltered-upbringing Doogie had never seen a belly button piercing before. Poor kid.

I must admit it was stretched and if you were squinting while looking at it, it MIGHT look like I had three belly buttons which um yah... would raise some questions about just how many umbilical cords I was strapped to in utero but whatever, no need to point and exclaim I'm a freak. But he was lucky - I was giddy from impending parenthood, so he was off the hook and no one screamed back at anyone.

So yes, I got sent back home - on the subway - feeling very proud for being so in-tune with my ability to predict the future. I was told to expect a call beckoning me back in, unless my labour started first.

And they called six hours later, just as Survivor was to start. I remember thinking "f**k, I really wanted to watch the show first... oh wait, I'm going to have a bayyyyyyyyy-beeeeeee". No seriously, I remember thinking that. I also remember commending myself on ordering the PVR in the weeks previous to this moment, because I was not so oblivious to parenthood, to know we were not going to be able to flake out and watch tv when we wanted, for as long as we wanted when we had a baby on board.

That was the last time I ever felt so prepared.

Tomorrow, she will be three. And three is bound to get up, demand food and drink plus a show, and at some point, smack me in the face to remind me how much three has brought into our lives.

35 comments:

Mamalooper said...

Love how you describe Bumper - she sounds like a gal that everyone should have in their life!

Happy happy day, Bumper. You are now officially a preschooler. Huzzah to three and all its contradictory/face-smacking/fall-on-the-floor emotional rollercoasters. Just wait til you hit 12...

Sandee (Comedy +) said...

What a delightful post. A big happy third birthday. :)

daysgoby said...

Happy, Happy Birthday, sweet girl!

You are so loved....

Heather said...

Great story. I love reading things like this...probably because I never got to experience the surprise factor of labor.

Happy bday Bumper!

Redneck Mommy said...

I just can't wait to meet her.

And take her to get her first tattoo and teach her how to table dance. I promise, I'll be her favourite aunty EVAH!

Mimi said...

Three. No, I'm sorry, I just can't bring myself to believe. I cannot be. And yet? It be. Wow. Congratulations to all of you.

(I love this story, btw, especially the yelling by the doctor and the roominess of the sweatpant advertising area. ha!)

No Mother Earth said...

Happy Birthday's Eve! Three is a really, really fun year.

(And your comment about wanting to watch Survivor first made me laugh out loud. That's so something I would think..)

Mayberry said...

I love motherbumper's take on sentimental. Screaming med students and all. Happy birthday, Gigi!

Mouse said...

They let you go home after your water broke? For me that was a one-way ticket to a labor and delivery room and a hook-up to whatever monitors they had around with a strict 24-hour deadline.

Anyway... Happy day-before-your-child's birth.

for a different kind of girl said...

Does Bumper dig older boys? I have a six year old who is suave. He likes to say things like "actually" and "perhaps and "Would m'lady like to dance?" Ok, he doesn't say that last one (yet!), but I like to think of him as a quaint little English butler. He'd treat her nice. Something to consider.

In the meantime, happy, glorious birthday to her (and you)!

Mandy said...

Happy birthday bumper (tomorrow). When moms wax nostalgic it's time for another baby. Dontchya think? ;)

scarbie doll said...

Happy Birthday to your gorgeous daughter and to her lovely mother who entertains us with stories of her spiritedness.

* sigh * feels like just yesterday she could barely talk and was running circles around Nate.

Kyla said...

Our mornings sound eerily similar. "Mommy! Put on my cartoons and gimme my chocolate MILK!" She really ups the volume when she says milk, lest I think she's asking nicely. She knows who is the boss, and it isn't me.

Happy birthday, Gigi. You are one of the most adorable and lovable 3 year old dictators I know.

naomicatgirl said...

Happy Birthday! Three has been quite the rollercoaster ride around here...wishing you much smoothness!!

mamatulip said...

I love this post. I love your sense of humour.

Happy Birthday, Gigi! And Happy Birth Day to you. You're an awesome mom.

Tracey said...

Happy Birthday to your lil girl and happy 3 years of parenting to you guys!

petite gourmand said...

the subway!!? really? you are one rockin' mama.

happy third b-day!
three really is the best.

Laura said...

Ah...the o'l, "If we knew then what we knew now"...
yeah, I have to say, I might have, at the very least, waited a few years longer...or not had so many...but, probably not. We moms love the torture, don't we?

Can I please bake her a cake????

April said...

hehehe, doogie...

Don Mills Diva said...

Happy birthday Bumper!

It never fails to amaze me how unprepared you (and by that I mena me) actually are for parenthood - no matter how many times you hear about what it will be like...

Ali said...

i did the whole leaking, not progressing, going nowhere fast, getting sent home thing. twice. those pesky stubborn babies.

happy 3 to you and Gigi!

LazyCrazyMama said...

Hilarious!! I love and can sympathize with not wanting to miss a show ;) And just love that you took the subway! Great story! And happy b-day to the b-day girl!

Chag said...

Happy Birthday, Gigi! Send me a slice of cake, will you?

catnip said...

I love reading birth stories, and that was a great one. :)

Anissa Mayhew said...

No picture of the piercing? I had to lose mine after birth because the belly button was just never the same. *sob*

Happy late birthday to three!

kittenpie said...

Happiest of birthdays, Miss G!
And I totally took the time to relax before having the babe this time. I kept thinking I should do laundry or something, and then decided, "Enough, woman!" and sat down to veg in front of the tv for TWO HOURS. Good for you for getting things right on the pvr fist - priorities and all!

Velma said...

Happy Belated Birthday to the G-Girl!

Her Bad Mother said...

*SIGH* Our girls are getting too big. Can we stunt them? Pleez?

XOXOXOXOX

mylitlbratz said...

"If we knew then what we know now"
yeah, i'd have to say, I may have not had so many(8)...but, probably not. I'm a sucker for pain, emotional drain and the un-questioning love you only get from being a mommy...

Stimey said...

Great post. Good for you for letting a med student check on you. And good for you for traumatizing him. Hopefully that taught him a little something about not being a dipshit in front of patients.

When I was in labor was the one time I said no to med students. I just was not in the mood.

hoppytoddle@gmail.com said...

Oh, thank you Deb (Iobsess) & Mimi for leading me here. I needed that hearty, wake-the-sleeping fam laugh at the size of the billboard & the doc scared of piercings.

I have a 3yo girlie, too. We've talked about the deal we made when she was 6 months that I would give her all the boobie she wanted as long as she didn't grow. She now uses that as an excuse to not go to sleep, because if she does, she'll grow.

Whit said...

Happy Birthday to the kiddo!

the weirdgirl said...

Happy belated birthday, Gigi!

EcoLabel Fundraising said...

Those are the sweet memories we will remember forever. I remember just settling into bed after being out at a festival all day long when my water broke. I'll never forget it. Life instantly got way more fun and more chaotic all at once!

Happy b-day to your tot!!

Jeanne Reslan

IRISHKAT said...

The price of getting jiggy?? I have never heard that before but will use it with your permission :) The part about the naval piercing cracked me up!! I had to take mine out because it started to tear - dang baby belly!