Monday Morning Chuck #78601

This WILL be my birthday cake this year - for real. I will cry if I don't get it because Nibbling on a bit of Chuck will totally make my day.

Which I guess is more of an Eastwood thing but whatever. Check out that chest ripple. Somebody has been using their Total Gym, haven't they now.


Anyhow... Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.

Oh and Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

Which totally is my reason for never learning the periodic table. That's my excuse and I'm stickin' to it - hear that Sister Mary Margaret?

So I'm back in the land of Toronto and I spent most of my free time yesterday putting together the shaffizzle to relaunch that group blog I'm so proud to be a part of: Better Than A Playdate (or the blog formally known as MommyBlogsToronto).

There are new columns and omg I'm now one of the writers at the Playdate gossip column, Binkywood because I LOVE TO SLAM FOLKS I WILL NEVER MEET AND THEREFORE CANNOT HURT ME. (Please don't hurt me if you are a celeb).

It's so much healthier to gossip about celebs than doing it to folks I do know. Anyhow, I'm writing for Binkywood which isn't all parent celeb gossip but holy crap it seems that babies are the fashion accessory du jour (last few years actually). Actually this whole baby thing is crazy - and the marriages - and hell, all those crazy stupid things folks like me do - but instead they do it on a scale that only a person with lotsa money to burn and an entourage that constantly states that the sun shines outta your butt can achieve. And I'm here to poke fun or add my two unsolicited cents. But sometimes I'm nice. It can happen. And I love to spread joy so that's why I do it. Especially when the joy spreadin' includes nudity, man-stealing, or someone totally losing their sh*t in public and going postal for the cameras.

And oh yes, I'm doing this BECAUSE I HAVE SO MUCH TIME ON MY HANDS! Yes I took on another blog.

Somebody have me committed because I'm officially WACKYDOODLE. Note the abuse of capitalization and random outbursts peppering this post.

I'm just a few outbursts short of being totally cuckoo for clonazepam puffs cocoa puffs.

Not really. I'm just being a total drama queen. Kinda.

But seriously I've been all over the place lately when it comes to the insanity scale. There has been a lot of reflection in recent days and I'll warn you potential nonsensical posts may be ahead.

These changes of season - regardless of need for warm weather - always screw with my fragile reading on the wheel of crazy. What? You don't have a way to measure how looney you are like my crazy wheel? I don't believe it. I read your blogs and I know I'm not alone on spinning up a loco like Britney kind of day. RIGHT?

Ack. Ignore me - go check out the new digs at Better Than A Playdate - it's still in beta and not all links are up yet but hot damn, it's gonna be a hell of a playdate.