I should be careful when I ask - part 1

So this is part one in answering the questions I asked for and you posed to find out the Tale of Motherbumper and what makes her tick like a cuckoo clock:

Shania wanted to know:

How I refrain from gloating about that adorable child in every post. She thinks she couldn't do the same.

Bumper's agent won't let me without heavy royalties - do you know how much that kid charges for an appearance - IT'S UNREAL!

My homegirl kgirl gave me a pop quiz:

If you could transplant anything East Coast to the T-dot, what would it be? (I'm from Nova Scotia for those who don't know)

I took liberties (who? moi? liberties? never - ha!) and made a list:

• My parents.
• The friendly, look-me-in-the-eye attitude.
• The ocean with A REAL beach.
• The awesome recycling and composting program (T-dot is at least trying).
• The zen of a city like Halifax that is part Buddhist community, part artisan colony, part University town, part mariner, with a whole lotta Trailer Park Boy.

no relation but a whole lot in common

Do you think you'll ever move back?

Do you know how often I think about that? DO YOU? Oh wait, you can't read my mind. You are so lucky. Anyhow, I would prefer transplanting the East up here.

If you could transplant anything T-dot to the East Coast, what would it be?

Nothing - enough of the T-dot invades and educates themselves in Halifax's plethora of Universities every single year so the annual infusion of the T-dot's youth is enough for now. Oh and every bar owner / bartender seemed to be from T-dot and made the move because they preferred the East Coast lifestyle to Tdot so it's not like you can't throw a rock and hit someone from Toronto.

Not that we throw rocks at Torontonians. Well not anymore since the legislation came in ordering us to stop picking on Toronto.

Wait I take that back - Toronto has wickedly good shopping. I'd transplant all the shoe stores. TAKE THAT!

Do you think I should join a gym?

Nah, I'll just start throwing rocks and you can run for exercise.

Ali wanted to know:

what's your biggest pet peeve?

Well when I was in the corporate world, my biggest pet peeve was people who took credit of others work. It happens so often that it's sickening. One becomes very insulated which is not conducive to team work and it just sucks.

So a sweeping statement of dishonesty as being biggest pet peeve. Oh and that fuzzy ice that forms on top of ice cream and popsicles when the freezer decides it hates you. HUGE PET PEEVE.

Darling Ali also asked:

what's YOUR most annoying habit?

Where to start? Taking on more work than I can possibly handle. Right now is an example. I love LOVE being busy but sometimes I just go overboard.

Also I sigh a lot and it drives SB bonkers.

Oh and I'm self-deprecating and nice to the point where some people want to stick a fork in me. I'm trying to control that one because I've realized that some folks out there have taken advantage of it. Now while I do play one in the blogosphere, I'm not stupid in real life (though I am nice) so I just deal with it in another way (how's that for a cloak and dagger answer?).

Oh gawd, I'm boring you aren't I?

I'm skipping a few of the next questions posed (I'm trying to answer in order) because the answers are stand alone posts. So I will skip to the lovely Mandy who asked:

What date do you wish you had never gone on and why?

So many to pick from... but I will settle for the one that always surfaces first:

I cannot for the life of me remember his name - seriously - but I met him through some friends. He didn't register on my radar but I apparently registered on his. He looked like the lead singer from A-Ha which wasn't too bad in my 19 year old books.

take on me - NOT

Quick backstory: I was always the single girl growing up - I dated every so often but I loved being single. Yet everyone would be fixing me up all the freakin' time - which was fine but OMG I met some wackos.

Back to AHa boy: so he bugged his friend for my number, and after some begging I decided why the hell not? He called to ask me to a movie which seemed very benign. How bad could it go?

yah riiiiight

So I meet him at the coffee house around the corner from the theatre about 30 mins before the show so we can chat - you know - get to know each other in safe setting. Well it turns out (not sure if this was planned) the movie wasn't starting for an hour so we had lots of time to talk.

Correction: HE had lots of time to talk.

This wasn't nervous chatter - this was completely all over the place talk where he basically gave me his opinion on everything from politics (scary), womens rights (almost walked out on that one), music (nothing in common), children (wtf? - we were 19), in addition to a host of other things including opinions on common acquaintances.

I wanted to walk out but honestly - I'm not great at being rude and I convinced myself "just make it the end of the movie and run". No backbone in my 19 year old self.

Finally it was movie time. We entered the theatre sat down and the movie started. I was so thankful for the relative silence.

Then he did the stretch - you know "the textbook date stretch: arm lands behind girls head a la Ritchie on Happy Days trying to be the Fonz".

I immediately stood up, excused myself to go to the loo and walked out of the theatre, straight to the local where I knew my friends would be playing pool and snapped in half the guy who convinced me to give up my digits.

GET THIS: he called a few days later and didn't mention a thing. And asked me out again. I found backbone and said NO!

OK - enough for now. Part two coming soon.