Sunday, February 15

You Know You're A Redneck Family When...

This past week, a dear friend became a mom very suddenly for the fourth time and because she's a self-described redneck (I think she can wrestle bears y'all), there is a shower going on in her honour that includes some the best redneck-themed prizes ever.  Because what's a shower without prizes like a wooden sex toys (I KID YOU NOT)?  Someone's Uncle Billy-Bob whittled it from a stick he found by the outhouse and now it could be yours - see all the details over at Playdate.

Anyhow, the theme of the shower is:

So I knew that I was a redneck mommy when I considered buying brand name mac n' cheese as being all fancy-like, y'all.
Gigi - Three Months & Already a Redneck
I also knew I was a redneck mommy when I discovered that the mouth on my child could make a sailor blush.  Oh and she was the first one in nursery school to refuse a teacher's request with the words "screw that".  Okay, that last one actually hasn't happened to yet but I'm waiting for the day.

Also, I knew I was a redneck mommy when all our baby toys consisted of random objects found around the house.  I figure as long as it doesn't pose a choking hazard, does the baby really care?  I didn't think so.

And the total confirmation was when my Mother's Day bouquet was displayed in the only vase in the house - a large beer bottle that wasn't used for target practice because it's considered "fancy" beer.  Okay, so this was the Valentine's Day flowers but still, you get the idea.

Anyhow, my child doesn't really swear that much, and I don't own a rifle anymore, but I think it's fair to say that I still consider myself a little bit redneck.  And if I'm anything like the official Redneck Mommy, well than I know I'm doing my job right.


Anonymous said...

My mom called me earlier this week to excitingly report that she got a donkey for Valentine's day.


And no, I didn't ask any questions. Sometimes you just don't want to know.

Vodka Mom said...

I LOVE the vase. Mine is an empty bottle of vodka. A BLUE bottle.

Amo said...

I was waiting for you to chime in!

I know you a *bit* better than all, girlfriend, are a true redneck. After all, you're the only one who commented on my "whiskey makes mine mean" comment...heh.

mamatulip said...

Dude, the vase. THE VASE.

I loves it.

Redneck Mommy said...

I have never loved you more.

There are no words my friend.

Thank you.


TwoBusy said...

Chimay? Mmmm... you've got a taste for the good stuff. Now, if that was a carnation sticking out of a Bud tallboy, then we'd really be talking...

Mandy said...

You're all class in my books!

Domestic Extraordinaire said...

Damn, I was so going to do this this weekend and then hubby had the unexplained 2 days off in a row. So needless to say blogging was the furtherest from my mind.

Love the vase, the only reason we have "real" ones is because I got them from my MIL when she saw that I was using a wine bottle (okay who am I kidding it was Mad dog....LOL) housing flowers.

HUGS and it was so awesome meeting you last weekend.

Colleen - Mommy Always Wins said...

Now some would see using a beer bottle as a "vahze" to be cute-kitsch and very Martha-esque. ;-)

rachel - a southern fairytale said...

THank heavens! Someone else whose kids have a straw cowboy'esque' hat in pictures. Whew!

What's wrong with using the fancy bottle? Isn't that what they're for? Shoot.

So fun!! I am loving reading through all these tributes to Tanis, such a brilliant idea.

Double Agent Girl said...

I'm utterly convinced it was the day you serinaded and marinated us with your tailgate striptease. Erm, or something.