My back is in need of rest and repair. Gah - it hasn't felt this way in months. My spine is wound tighter than Laura Linney's Oscar dress. Speaking of Oscar:
Last night I did something I wanted to do for a long time, I blogged something live. Cynical Dad was
The red carpet portion was pretty much all mine and while it was disappointing to miss some of the big names because they all arrived fashionably late (Depp? I didn't see Depp until the show started, where was my Cate? Oh it was so frustrating), I did get to see Mylie Cyrus.
Wait a second: Please explain to me how SHE got invited and given the job of presenter. I was still reeling from the Rocks presentation (The Rock? Rock?) and I just about chocked on my chicken leg when Mylie got up to hand out an award.
Was this Oscar show thrown together last minute OR WHAT? Was everyone really that busy last night that those two insignificant bleeps on the entertainment radar got to hand out statues?
Needless to say I passed out just after the French fish woman took best supporting actress (am I alone in hating that dress?: too many "90210 Donna goes to frat Hallowe'en party as a mermaid and gets molested" flashbacks for me to even give it half a chance).
So far from reading the recaps this morning, I know that I must find out what the "bad" Harrison Ford joke was all about. And I must drool of Javiar some more.
Good golly, is it just me or was most of the script for the show god awful? Obviously the improv skill of most of today's Hollywood is very VERY rusty.
Why did I pass out so horrifically early and leave Cynical Dad to cover the rest? Because I spent a huge chunk of Sunday on a long drive home from a quick family visit home (to celebrate new baby in family! mmmmmmmmm new baby) and while the drive was manageable, the vomiting toddler in the back seat was not.
It scares me to listen to her hurling while I'm flying down, I mean, driving leisurely down the road, looking for a space to stop without being crushed by an 18-wheeler. Aren't you jealous of all the fun? And the fun doesn't stop there - try cleaning out the rental car in record time before the return deadline. Driving around town with windows cranked down in Arctic weather - FUN TIMES.
So why did I do Oscar coverage live after a day like that? Because I wanted to do it dammit! I love making fun of celebrities, it's in my blood. Sure I held back on being ruthless on someone else's blog but I'll have my talons out today as I read the recaps.
Despite passing out two nights in a row in a pretzel position which has my back screaming out in pain as I type this sentence (and explains the first
So give me your Oscar two cents - I've got to catch up and find out who else won, who wore what, did Paris try to crash the party, and research remedies for motion sickness in toddlers. Woah, life doesn't get more exciting than this.
Oh and also I need to go read all the Toronto Blogger's blogs today. I missed a rocking party this weekend and need to know who went home with who, who left their baby in the coat check, and who drank who under the table. It always pans out that way. Please give me any good blackmail fodder if you were in attendance (did anyone even notice I wasn't there? *big sob*).